This post is one of my favorites, and we are going to be debunking common lies in femininity and homemaking, for as a woman who loves being very feminine and who also wants to be a homemaker one day, I think it is time we finally sit down and go over common “lies” that are within both of these areas, for homemaking and femininity go together, and I would love to address them from a personal standpoint.
Lie One: Femininity is evil
Femininity is not evil, and I have written about this before, and yet Feminism claims that femininity is evil, that femininity is wrong, and that all will crumble due to femininity, and that is not true. Personally, I feel as if femininity is extinct in our society, and it is worrisome that femininity is not longer present.
I love my dresses, I love wearing my heels, I love making my hair curly, I love putting on my Mary Kay, I love wearing my hair ribbons, and I love my favorite perfume, and this is not evil, for femininity was also made in the eyes of the Lord; therefore, I am going to look like a woman, I am going to be a very feminine woman, and I am going to hopefully inspire other women as well in a world where femininity is going away.
Lie Two: Homemakers are “lazy” or “don’t do anything”
“She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:27
“The only thing homemakers do is watch soap operas,” and this is a lie. I am not a homemaker yet, but I can tell you that homemakers do so many things rather than watching soap operas. As a woman who wants to be a stay-at-home mom who home schools one day while selling Mary Kay, I find it quite insulting to label women who want to tend to the home as lazy. There is nothing wrong with being a homemaker, just like there is nothing wrong with having a career; however, we have deemed only some women as “successful,” and that is quite one-sided.
Yes, my future husband and I will have to live simply, and I am okay with that. I might be feminine, but I am okay with simple living, I am okay with not being rich, and I am okay with being a little feminine wife and mother who loves to cook, bake, hang calligraphy sign, and who cares for her plants and garden, for the entire point of homemaking is a selfless devotion to our families, and though I am not a wife or a stay-at-home mom yet, I can assure you that it is a constant job that never ends.
Lie Three: Feminine modesty is “frumpy”
“Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.” Proverbs 31:25
I believe in femininity and modesty, and even though we live in a time where modesty is no longer prevalent, I do believe in beautiful modesty, for we should be clothed in dignity and strength; however, modesty does not mean “frumpy,” and if I had to be honest, I hate the word frumpy.
As a woman who loves fashion and femininity, I can attest that “frumpy” is not a word in my vocabulary, and yet to the feminists, when they hear “modesty, “they think of the word “frumpy.” Now, are there women who take modesty to the extremes of frumpy? Yes, but does modesty have to be frumpy? No.
Beautiful and feminine modesty is cute and beautiful. and you don’t have to be frumpy either; therefore just because I am a modest woman, does not mean I am frumpy, but it just means I am fashionable without having to show anything off, for I am clothed in the Lord’s love, and I don’t need to prove anything to be validated.
Lie Four: Homemakers are not “educated”
I hate this lie, for guess what? Most of us homemakers are educated and very smart. Personally, I decided on Elementary Education due to not only loving children and teaching, but also due to one day wanting to homeschooling my future children, and guess what? I am college educated, but does me wanting to be a homemaker make me uneducated? No.
This lie comes from feminists, for feminist believe that “all” women must break glass ceilings, and that is not true. If a woman wants to be a career woman, then that is great, but to the women who want to be homemakers, we aren’t “uneducated,’ but we have chosen a selfless job and life, for have decided to give up what we want for the needs and wants of our future husbands and children, but to demote us for wanting to take care of our home is very immature and stupid.
Me wanting to ensure that my future husband is heard, well feed, and comes to a clean home where his children are learning, safe, happy, and loved is worth giving up anything for; therefore, I don’t need a big career to feel validated, and I don’t need a lot of money to be happy, for I believe in simple living, not “grandiose” living, for that’s not necessary in the end. In the end, all the riches, fame, and “value” of the earth will dissolve instantly like snow.
Lie Five: Being feminine is hard
A lot of women tell me, “How can you be so feminine! Being feminine is hard,’ and yet the Lord has instilled within women the very capabilities of being feminine, and so I never understood how it was hard, and yet it is hard for women in 2019 to be feminine due to the fact that of forgetting how to be a woman in the process of wanting to prove something to men.
“Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” 1 Peter 3:3-4
True femininity is not proving men wrong, but true femininity is embracing who you are in the radiance the Lord made you in, and men are just as valued in the eyes of God as women are, for a true feminine and godly woman does not compete with a man, but she walks along side him; therefore, true femininity comes from a gentle and soft soul that seeks the Lord while also wanting to encourage others, and when you have the feminine heart, then it makes femininity on the outside easy to obtain.
We live in a world that has made being feminine such a bad thing, that women have bought into that mentality, which is why we women becoming carbon copies, where everyone woman is becoming a clone, and where the lines are blurring. In the end, I am a woman, and I am going to be a woman, for there is nothing evil or wrong about femininity, for the Lord made it within His imagine.
Lie Six: You cannot be content with being a feminine homemaker, for you will always wonder “what if.”
I can tell you this right now, if all I ever was on this earth was a feminine wife and mother, I would die a happy woman who was content. Again, I am content with having a simple life that is not “showy,” I am okay with being a simple wife and mother, and you don’t have to ask me, “Are you going to regret it,” for I won’t. I promise you, I am not going to look back and wonder, for even if my children are screaming and running around while my future husband is asking me where his favorite shirt is, I am still going to be happy.
Even with my kids’s vomit on me, even when my future children are crying, and even when my future husband might be getting on my nerves just a little bit at times, I will still choose to sacrifice everything for them. I will still love my future husband even in tough moments, I will still love my future husband even if he forgets to buy that one thing at the grocery store, and I will still love my future husband even if he messes up the 10 pillows on the bed; I will still love him, I will still greet him everyday with a smile, and I will still choose him.
I will still love my future children even if they place their painted hand prints on the walls that will take me hours to get off, I will still love my future children even if they get into things they shouldn’t be getting into, and I will still love my future children even if they are crying, not wanting to do their schoolwork, or whatnot; I will still choose to sacrifice everything for my future husband and children.
“Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.” Proverbs 31:29-31
So no, I am not going to regret it, and though I am as single as can be, if I could somehow marry my future husband tomorrow, I would, and if he’d be okay with starting a family right away, I’d also be okay with that, so I don’t have time to regret things, for I am okay with sacrificing all my my wants while laying down my life for my future family, for they are worth it.
In the end, these are the common lies that I see in femininity and homemaking, and these things normally get on my nerves, for Feminism has twisted so many things to justify their ideologies. Femininity is not evil, it is not frumpy, and it is not hard, and homemaking is beautiful, selfless, and full of joy; therefore, I will be a feminine woman who is not afraid to be overdressed, and I will also not be afraid to sacrifice everything I want for my future husband and children.
I know I am a different woman, and I am okay with that, for the life I want is one where I am being the feminine Proverbs 31 woman while being a victorious homemaker who loves her future family; therefore, this is the life that I choose, this is the life that I humble myself towards, and I am okay with nothing more, for in the end, less is more, and I don’t need “more” to be content, for with the blood of Jesus, His grace was more than what any of us deserve.