It is freezing in North Carolina, which I hate with such a passion, but it is now the Christmas season, and I have purchased an advent Bible study, I have my Christmas decorations going up, I am listening to the infamous Michael Bublé Christmas album, and I am dressing in cute Christmas dresses, skirts, and feminine apparel.
I love Christmas, and it is my favorite season of the entire year, so don’t blame me for wanting to celebrate as early as I can, because Christmas goes by way too fast, and I want to enjoy it as long as I can, for Christmas is my favorite season due to the Hallmark Christmas movies, the gingerbread, the lights, and of course, Jesus.
However, I am not a fan of the cold, and I hate cold weather due to being really tiny, and so I am inside, drinking a hot cup of coffee, and I am writing this while watching Hallmark Christmas movies.
Today, I’m not writing about marriage, singleness, or godly dating today, and though my blog has been about a single woman’s thoughts on life, faith, godly men, and marriage for the past few years, I also made this blog geared to another thing I am passionate about; femininity.
Not only that, but today, I am challenging feminism.
I am a feminine woman, I am an aspiring Proverbs 31 Woman, and I love all things feminine. I am a dress lover, a vintage lover, and I love fashion, Mary Kay, and so forth, so femininity is a big part of who I am as a young woman. I am a woman who wants to inspire other women to find confidence in femininity while also having a radiance in Christ, for the root of true beauty is in a heart that seeks God.
Sadly, we live in a society where femininity is a taboo topic or a thing that is going extinct, which frightens me, for femininity is made in the image of God as well as masculinity, and yet we are denying femininity due to people believing it makes a woman “weak” or “below a man,’ and neither of these things are true.
In fact, I want a man who will nurture my femininity, who will be a protector, who will be a man who is thankful for having a feminine wife, because so many women are giving up femininity in the fight of trying to always tell men, “I can do things better than you,” and while I am not trying to make hyper-political yet, I do not agree with Modern-Day Feminism, and I never will.
Feminism is telling little girls that Princesses are wrong, that marriage is oppressive due to “being supportive of the “patriarchy,'” and we have feminists telling little girls that Prince Charming is a “toxic, misogynistic, pig who is detrimental to the Feminist cause,” and I do not agree with any of this at all, for we are telling little girls that it is not okay to be a little girl.
Society has become so fixated on wanting to take men down, on wanting to have the last word, and wanting to prove something that we have forgotten the gentle and incorruptible beauty found in femininity, and it is saddening when I look around and see women denying their femininity is the name of “feminism” just to prove a point.
And what is that point?
Really, at the end of the day, what point is begin made?
Is the point about feminists want to be better than men, or is the point about feminism want to tell men. “you are not that special”” What is the actual point that is worth risking femininity for?
We live in a free country where women can be whatever they want in a profession, where women can vote, where women can drive, where women can go to college, and where women are in the land of the free, so what are feminists truly fighting for?
Femininity has been made to be an evil thing, which is why so many feminists accuse God of being “sexist,” and I believe that this claim is one of the most blasphemous claims one can make, for all were made in the image of God, and God is not, and never will be, sexist.
So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” Genesis 1:27
God is perfect in all of His ways, and for society to demean God’s honor is downright disrespectful, and there is no way around this truth; it is disrespectful of all that He has done for us, and for us to be made in His image just to turn around and call Him “sexist,” is horrid.
Many believe that since the Lord says that beauty is found in a gentle and quiet spirit it means He wants women to “shut up and make a sandwich,” and that is taking Scripture and twisting it into something it does not mean to support one’s thinking, and this happens a lot in 2019; just take the gospel, place your spin on it, and boom; you made a counterfeit gospel, and this is sadly happening in society. Look at the prosperity gospel. It has warped the Word of God into something is was never meant to be, and yet people have justified it time and time again
There is a reason why the Lord says true beauty is found in a gentle and quiet spirit, for look at all that is happening. Truly, look at it. Feminists protesting the streets to abort their children, feminists boycotting anyone who has a slight difference in beliefs, feminists attacking people for praying outside of Planned Parenthood to spare the babies, feminists demeaning marriage as oppressive, and feminists giving up their ability to have children due to wanting to do what their body wants.
Is that truly beautiful and God glorying? No.
“Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” 1 Peter 3:3-4
The reason why true beauty is found in a heart that is gentle and meek is because her heart can be still and hear the gentle whispers of the Lord, and when she hears His voice, she is lead by Him, she is used by Him, and she is not allowing emotions, loudness, or chaos to rule her, but she is allowing the Lord to use her by being still.
True beauty is having seasoned speech and having a soft answer, for a soft answer turns away wrath.
True beauty is being a woman who is compassionate and a lover of broken people, for the Lord loved us in our darkest.
True beauty is a woman who does not seek to have the last word, but is a woman who seeks to be humble and meek by letting the love of Christ shine throughout her.
True beauty is a woman who is confident in the design she was made in, which is feminine, beautiful, and worth more than rubies, and nothing on this earth can compare to her worth found in Christ.
That is true beauty; a woman who goes before the Lord in stillness so she can hear His voice, and it was never meant to be construed to mean anything less, for a woman who fears the Lord shall be praised.
Femininity was made in God’s design, and it is unique, for God has a unique plan for women that a man cannot do, and that is bare children.
I do not believe a man should want to prove to women that “he can do everything a woman can,” nor do I believe that women should go around saying, “I can do anything a man can,” for though we were both made in the image of God, we were made with beautiful differences that make us both unique in His sight. Men were made to protect, women were made to be an encouragement, Men were made to lead his family on the narrow path, and women were made to be the supporter and the helper, and both for these beautiful differences are needed and crucial to a marriage and family.
Just because a man leads and a woman is a helper does not mean one is better than the other, but it means that through these differences, the love of Christ can be balanced within the marriage and family, and when two people are the exact same, where is the balance?
In the eyes of God, it was never about competition, it was never about domination, and it was never about one proving to be better than the other, but it was about Christ being glorified and reflected between man and woman, and yet we have tried to so hard to dismember femininity, that we are denying that femininity was made in the image of God.
And what is that uniqueness that is so precious in femininity other than the feminine outlook and spirit?
“Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them;
They shall not be ashamed,
But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.” Psalm 127:3-5
The beautiful gift of childbearing is something I will always thank the Lord for, and yet it is the number one thing that Satan has tried so carelessly to destroy in society. Satan has gotten to the core of femininity and is trying to rip it apart. We have abortion, the phrase, “My body, My choice,” and we have so many women not realizing the beautiful life inside of them, and this is how femininity has been construed.
The Lord allowed women to be able to conceive life, carry life for nine months, and give birth to life, and this is one of the greatest gifts of God, and I am more than eager to be a mother, and I pray wifehood and motherhood arrive soon, for I will never take my gift of child baring for granted, and I will never place it on a back burner as if it’s not important, for the most beautiful thing about femininity is the child baring and the baring of little souls that will hopefully one day be shinning bright for the Lord.
I am a feminine woman, and I will never be ashamed for wearing my dresses, for being a lady, or for being a woman who wants to have a gentle and meek spirit, for I would rather be a woman who is unknown than be a woman who is known to society. I will embrace being a woman made in God’s image, and I embrace the ideal of being made to be a helper.
“Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Because the thing is, is that I am going to be a man’s wife one day, and I might not be a wife right now and I might be single, but I will be the wife of a man, and somewhere he is praying that I am the woman who will support him, encourage him, and will be there to grab his hand and walk with him through bad moments, trials, through valleys and through mountain tops, and I do not want to compete with my future husband, but I want to lift my husband up, I want to breathe tenderness into his life, and I would be willing to risk my dreams to see my husband and children succeed in their dreams, because it’s not about me, it never was, but it’s about them, and feminism is all about the “self.”
I want to be feminine for my future husband, I want to be a lady he can protect, cherish, and I want him to be able to come home to a feminine wife who is making his favorite meal while out children are drawing pictures or whatnot, and I don’t want my future husband to think that he is in competition with his wife, and I did not want my future husband to feel as if his wife is always thinking, “I can do better than you,” for that is not my intent, and it never will be.
“And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.””
Somewhere on this earth a man needs me, and that is not sexist, but it is showing that God created woman so man would not be alone, and my company will be a blessing. I will be a helper, an encouragement, and I will be supporter to my future husband in his role as a godly man, and this is not sexist or demeaning, but it reflects Christ.
When I have daughters one day, I would love to give them very feminine names such as Penelope, Charlotte, and Eleanor if my future husband likes those names, and I will read them Princess stories, I will let them dream about “Prince Charming,” I will let them dress up in Princess dresses, pretend walk in my heels, and I will allow them to pamper themselves with face masks or hair rollers while we paint our nails with mommy on Friday nights.
Most importantly, I will never, ever tell my future daughters the lies that feminism has perpetuated, because there is nothing wrong with being a feminine woman, there is nothing wrong with being a wife and a mother, and there is nothing wrong with not wanting to compete with a man, for as a godly woman, I don’t compete, because my worth is in Christ, and I find my validation in Him and Him alone.
I am not made to compete with my future husband, but I am made to walk with him on the narrow path in a unique way, which is through encouragement, tenderness, gentleness, and humility, and if that means I am “less” in the eyes of society, then so be it, but I am a feminine woman who does not see the need to be like the world, but I seek to be beautiful in the eyes of God due to having a gentle and meek spirit, and I will not trade that kind of spirit for anything in the world, for the world will dissolve like snow, but a heart that loves the Lord will forever shine.
So let’s breathe femininity back into a world where many have forgotten the uniqueness and the beauty of being a feminine woman made in the perfect image of God.
P.S, I made my first skirt, and I am quite happy with how it turned out. I have always loved sewing and homemaking, and as a creativity and artsy woman, the idea of making my own clothes has always intrigued my artistic brain, and I finally finished all of the finishing details, and it is perfect for the Christmas season, and it allows me to embrace my femininity even more.