I am in love with Jesus, utterly in love with Him, and I hope that it shows in my words, my actions, and through my entire countenance. Everyday, I wake up saying “I love you Jesus,” and I go to bed saying those same words, but I feel like many Christian women are forgetting this very thing.
I get it; you want a future husband, and I can understand, for I am a young woman who prays her future husband, but do not mix prayers with desperation, for while you are a single woman, you should be in love with Jesus, for you will never be able to love a future husband if you are not able to love Christ
If you cannot love the man who died on a cross for you, then what makes you think you’ll be able to love a man who will get down on one knee for you?
“But he’s my future husband, I will love him,” but Jesus is your Savior who died for you, so how can you not love Christ? If you cannot place Jesus as your first priority, then you will never be able to fully love anyone else. You will not be able to love a husband, children, or anyone for that matter if you refuse to place Christ first in your life. Without embracing the love of Christ, you will be unable to understand any other love, for you are neglecting the very one who gave us the ability to love; Jesus.
However, I remember when I was a naive fifteen year old girl, and I thought the same thing. I was afraid of letting go of this fairy tale I had in my mind, for I thought that God would make me an “old maid” if I fully gave up the pen, but I was wrong. I was sorely wrong, and I am so glad that God showed me how wrong I was, for the greatest thing I have ever done was give up the pen and give it to God.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
I do not worry about my future, nor do I worry about the ifs or whens, for God is in control. I have learned to be still, and in the meantime, I am fully in love with Jesus. I have experienced such pure joy, radiance and overwhelming love in His presence. I am unable to describe the way His contentment and joy is, for it is captivating, it is never-ending, ad it will fully completely you.
So ladies, give up the hold you have on you future husband, for you are not doing yourself any good. Your future husband is okay, he will not “go away,” but you need to let go and fall in love with the man who will love you more than your husband ever could, which is Jesus.
You need to experience the truest form of love before God can ever allow you to experience the love of a man, for many do not understand that when God allows a man into your life, you are both walking towards Christ together, so you both need to be utterly in love with Christ. One cannot be slacking, one cannot be “half in,” and one cannot be fully in love with Jesus while the other is not, for both of you must be in complete adoration with Christ before he brings you both together.
If you are not strong in your relationship with Christ, then do not expect to make a godly marriage work
I am not married, so I am not one to give marriage advice. However, I do know that if you place anything before God it will fail, for anything above Him will fall. This is why it is important to not make idols out of anything. Though marriage and children are some of His greatest blessings, do not make them your idol or else they will crumble in front of you.
It perplexes me how some think that a godly marriage will come at ease when their relationship with Christ is suffering. If you are suffering in your walk with Jesus, then you will suffer in your marriage with your husband, for, again, if you cannot be in complete love with Christ, then you will not be able to love a man or be a good wife to a man.
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8
Your relationship with Christ should be so important to you, that others can see Him shining through you. You should be so dedicated to Christ, that you do not allow an inch for Satan to wander in your life, for if you give him an inch, he will wreak havoc in your life. Jesus is our first love, for He loved us while we were still sinners; therefore, your relationship with Jesus will surpass any other relationship you may possibly have, for your relationship with Jesus surpasses past death while marriage ends at death.
“According to the grace of God which was given to me, as a wise master builder I have laid the foundation, and another builds on it. But let each one take heed how he builds on it. For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.” 1 Corinthians 3:10-11
While marriage is beautiful, you cannot expect to have a godly foundation if you are unwilling to place Christ as first in your life, and you cannot expect a strong marriage that is rooted in Christ if you are not able to root yourself in Christ while as a single woman while you are waiting; therefore, before you ever think of giving your heart to a man, make sure your relationship with Christ is strong, for if you are not strong in Christ, then you will not be strong in anything else either.
If you cannot be faithful to Christ fully, then you will not be able to be faithful to a future husband fully.
“For by Him all things were created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created through Him and for Him. 17 And He is before all things, and in Him all things consist.” Colossians 1:16-17
If you can wander from Christ and become entranced by other things that take your eyes off of Christ, then the same can happen with your future husband. If you are unable to stay faithful to Christ, then you will not be able to be faithful to a husband. Many women claim “I would never do that to my future husband” yet they do it to Christ. If you wouldn’t do that to your husband, then why would you do that to Jesus who died on the cross for you? Christ should be placed before all things, for He is the one who wrote the love story you yearn for, and if He sees that you are unable to be faithful to the author, then why should Christ allow you to enter the next chapter?
It all goes back to Jesus; the beginning. If you are not able to say “no” to sin, then you will not be able to say “no” once married. Many women believe that marriage has a power to “change” them into a godly spouse, yet that does not happen, for if you are an ungodly woman before marriage, then you will become an ungodly wife. If you are a selfish woman before marriage, then you will become a selfish wife, and the list could go on.
With that being said, make it a habit of staying faithful Christ by ensuring that your walk with Him is not suffering. Marriage is a gift from God, but do not place is higher than the love of God, for though a man will love you like Christ, your future husband is not Jesus, nor will he ever be. Make Jesus your Savior, not a husband. Make Jesus the one who you are living for, make Jesus the one who you are utterly in love with, and make Jesus the foundation of your life.
“We love Him because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19
Therefore, let go of the pen, let God write your love story, but in the meantime, fall completely in love with Christ, for His presence is overwhelming, His love is under-ending, His joy indescribable, and His Word are sweeter than honey. I want my future husband to find me completely in love with Jesus rather slacking in my faith, for I want that man to know that Jesus is first, Jesus is my first love, and Jesus will forever be the cup that will not run dry, and I hope you have the same mindset.
Your future husband is out there, so there is no need to worry, so instead of worrying about the details, focus on growing in Christ, for without Him, you would not be able to love a man, for if God would not have given us grace, there would be no love, for without His love, we would be doomed, in darkness, and in turmoil, so fall in love with Christ, for it is because of Him that we are able to love