Purity is one of those topics that I’ve been studying in-depth at the current moment, and it’s also something that you don’t see anymore. We live in a time where doing what you want with who you please is considered normal, which is a very destructive mentality that both leaves you feeling empty and feeling shameful, which was never in God’s plan for your life.
As a young woman, I normally get asked “Christina, what is the big deal with waiting?” It isn’t normal for those my age to be passionate on being a virgin until marriage, and purity is considered taboo in current day society, but I plan on waiting and it is the best choice that I have ever made.
Some people think that I am waiting due to “my parents,” and others think I am waiting due to “fear of rejection,” but those excuses are not valid reasons on why I personally chose to wait until I am married.
I am waiting for marriage because I am worth more than a one night stand
In 2018, we live in a hookup culture where you have “causal sex” or “have sex with your best friend with no strings attached,” and both of those mindsets are wrong. There is no such things as “no strings attached sex,” for sex is very powerful, it brings two people together and unites them, and it has a strong emotional bond on both people; therefore, I truly want to wait for my future husband, for he is the man that is worthy of such a gift, for he will love me like Christ does rather than through the lens of “hookup culture.”
“She is more precious than rubies,
And all the things you may desire cannot compare with her.” Proverbs 3:15
Therefore, I am worth more than rubies, and I embrace the design and the worth that God made me in, so why am I going to allow a random man who isn’t my future husband to come into my life and destroy what God established?
15 minutes of lust isn’t worth the lifelong years of regret
I care about my future husband, so I refuse to break his heart over 15 minutes of passion that will ultimately lead me to lifelong shame. Personally, and I know this is controveral territory due to the times we live in, I don’t want to live the rest of my life wondering if my husband has truly forgiven me, I don’t want to have to live my life always feeling ashamed in front of God, and I don’t want to have to live my life always regretting my decision.
HOWEVER, I know that there are women who have fallen into temptation, and they are worthy of God’s forgiveness as well as being cherished by a godly man who can forgive as well. With that being said, I have met women who have encouraged me in my purity for they know the pain that comes with not waiting, so due to their words of encouragement, I choose to continue to wait for my future husband.
Therefore, I am going to wait, for I don’t want to to allow Satan any room to cripple me with shame when the Lord has set me free, for the devil is a lion who seeks to kill, steal, and destroy, which is why we should be alert in our faith at all times due tot he adversary yearning to make us fall before the Lord.
“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.” 1 Peter 5:8
God never meant for us to go through that kind of shame, so I refuse to put myself into the seat of shame. God meant for us to have everlasting joy in His name, and I want to live in that purpose. My future husband is a man who is worth waiting for, and that is what gives me the strength to wait. Knowing that there is a man who is going to be there to make the waiting worth it is an encouragement, so I refuse to live in regret, but I live in hope.
I don’t have to have premarital-sex with a man to know if God wants me to marry him
Way back when, someone asked me, “Christina, how will you know if the guy is “the one” if you don’t have sex? What if you both aren’t compatible for each other and are stuck in a marriage that isn’t working?” Sex is not the way God will tell me if my husband is the one. God will tell me who my husband is through my prayers, through my faithfulness, and through my waiting. Society is very lust-filled and immoral, so why would I take advice from them?
However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come.” John 16:13
I don’t have to fall short of God’s glory to know if my future husband is the one. God will whisper to my heart and let me know who my husband is without me having to commit a sin. God will whisper to my future husband’s heart that I am his wife without him having to fall into sin as well.
Hollywood bases marriage solely on lust, which is why their marriages fail. Lust is not love, and lust burns out after awhile. The man I will marry one day will be godly, compassionate, tender, sweet, loving, and will be a man that is seeking to be like Christ. Therefore, through his character and his love for God, this is how I will find out if he is “the one.”
Lust will not lead me to my future husband, but instead, it will drive me further away from finding out who he is.
I am faithful to my future husband and my body rightfully belongs to him
“Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?” 1 Corinthians 6:19
We live in a very feministic culture where women yell “my body, my choice,” but that is a very immoral statement. My body is not my own, but it is a temple. Whatever I do should be God-honoring and God-glorying. Not only that, but when I am married, my body then belongs to my husband and his will belong to me. God doesn’t “hate women,” for he commands the same thing out of my future husband, which is why I am expecting my husband to be waiting for me as well.
I might be a single woman , but I am faithful to the man who will get down on one knee for me and who finds me worth marrying. This is why I don’t wear bikins or do certain thigns, for I am a some man’s future wife, and I am going to be a godly woman who acts like it until whoever he is makes me his wife.
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22
As a future wife, I am to be submissive to my husband, but submission has been highly degraded these days. Submission doesn’t mean my husband being a dictator, but it means him being a representation of Christ and me being respectful to him. Marriage is all about compromise and leading each other to Christ, but I also am to be faithful to my future husband even though we aren’t married yet in the areas of purity and morality.
I am waiting for my husband out of submission to him. I know that my future husband has high standards towards the woman he wants me to be, and one of his standards is probably me being strong in the pursuit of purity, modestly, and morality, and I do not plan on messing up and falling into shame. I do not want break my future husband’s heart before he ever gives it to me; therefore, I will respect my husband by respecting myself.
In conclusion, these are the reasons why I am saving myself for marriage. I’m not waiting due to my parents, I am not waiting due to “fear of rejection,” and I am not waiting due to anyone “forcing me too,” but it’s my choice for I want to honor God. I find my future husband worth valuable in my eyes, so I want him to feel valued by him being able to have a very godly wife who thought of him as worth waiting for.
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9
If you fell into sin of sexual immorality, you can still have a godly marriage. God is a forgiving God, and He is willing and just to forgive you, and you future husband will still love you for he sees you as a person who was redeemed by God. Don’t let this post make you feel ashamed, but embrace in God’s forgiveness and mercy, and one day, God will let the man who will love you and your scars regardless of what you did in your past.
Make waiting of high importance, for someone out there is waiting for you. Don’t fall for the definition of love that this world has projected, for movies do not predict real love, and most of what you see society promoting is lustful rather than being based on true love designed by God.
I am not ashamed of my virginity or waiting, and you shouldn’t either, for the wait will be worth it. The journey might not be easy at times, but when you get to the finish line, you can look back and see the victory you have accomplished, and that will be the greatest feeling in your life, so make waiting a priority rather than an option.