(photo credit: Unsplash)
Purity is one of those topics that I’ve been studying in-depth at the current moment, and it’s also something that you don’t see anymore. We live in times where doing what you want with who you please is considered normal, which is a very destructive mentality that both leaves you feeling empty and feeling shameful, which was never in God’s plan for your life.
As a young woman, I normally get asked “Christina, what is the big deal with waiting?” It isn’t normal for those my age to be passionate on waiting, and purity is considered taboo in current day society, but I plan on waiting and it is the best choice that I have ever made.
Some people think that I am waiting due to my parents raising me up in church and others think I am waiting due to “fear of rejection,” but those excuses are not valid reasons on why I personally chose to wait until I am married.
I am waiting for marriage because I am worth more than a one night stand
In 2018, we live in a hookup culture where you have “causal sex” or “have sex with your best friend with no strings attached,” and both of those mindsets are wrong. There is no such things as “no strings attached sex,” becaus sex is very powerful, it brings two people together and unites them, and it has a strong emotional bond on you both.
I am worth more than a guy who just sees me as another “score,” I am worth more than a guy who isn’t going to lead me to marriage, and I am worth more than having to subject myself to pain that God didn’t want me in.
“She is more precious than rubies,
And all the things you may desire cannot compare with her.” Proverbs 3:15
I am worth more than rubies, and I embrace the design and the worth that God made me in, so why am I going to allow a random man who isn’t my future husband to come into my life and destroy what God established? Trust me, temptation is real, and I am not hear trying to say that waiting is easy, but I have to deny myself, I have to carry my cross, and I realize that my purity is sacred in the eyes of God.
15 minutes of lust isn’t worth the lifelong years of regret
I care about my future husband, and I don’t want to do something “in the moment” that would cause me to feel lifelong shame. However,I know that there are women who have fallen into temptation, and they are worthy of God’s forgiveness, and I cannot imagine the amount of pain those women must go through. I have met women who have encouraged me in my purity for they know the pain that comes with not waiting.
Therefore, I am going to wait, because I know that waiting will always be worth it, and I refuse to allow whatever I may feel now dictate what is to come, for we aren’t perfect, we will be tempted, but with the strength of Christ, no temptation will overcome us; therefore, I wait until marriage and stay strong in Christ while I am a single woman.
“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.” 1 Peter 5:8
God never meant for us to go through shame when He defeated the grave. God meant for us to have peace, joy, and happiness, and I want to live in that purpose. My husband is a man who is worth waiting for, and that is what gives me the strength to wait. Knowing that there is a man who is going to be there to make the waiting worth it is an encouragement, so I live in hope.
I don’t have to have premarital-sex with a man to know if God wants me to marry him
One time, a lady asked me “Christina, how will you know if the guy is “the one” if you don’t have sex? What if you both aren’t compatible for each other and are stuck in a marriage that isn’t working?” Sex is not the way God will tell me if my husband is the one. God will tell me who my husband is through my prayers, through my faithfulness, and through my waiting. Society is very lust-filled and immoral, so why would I take advice from them?
However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come.” John 16:13
I don’t have to lose something to know if my husband is the one. God will whisper to my heart and let me know who my husband is without me having to commit a sin. God will whisper to my future husband’s heart that I am his wife without him having to fall into sin as well.
Hollywood bases marriage solely on sex, and that isn’t the full picture of marriage, for love is much more than what we can receive from it, for marriage is a reflection of Christ; therefore, I will wait, and no, I do not have to lose something to know if I am in love, for love speaks for itself.
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9
If you fell into sin of sexual immorality, you can still have a godly marriage. God is a forgiving God, and He is willing and just to forgive you, and you future husband will still love you for he sees you as a person who was redeemed by God. Don’t let this post make you feel ashamed of yourself, but embrace in God’s forgiveness and mercy, and one day, God will let the man who will love you and your scars regardless of what you did in your past.
Make waiting of high importance, for someone out there is waiting for you. Don’t fall for the definition of love that this world has projected, for movies do not predict real love, and most of what you see society promoting is lustful rather than being based on true love designed by God.
I am not ashamed of waiting, and you shouldn’t either, for the wait will be worth it. The journey might not be easy at times, but when you get to the finish line, you can look back and see the victory you have accomplished, and that will be the greatest feeling in your life, so make waiting a priority rather than an option.