I remember the guy like it was yesterday; he was tall, handsome, sweet, and loved Jesus entirely! 18 year old Christina was literally blushing at the sight of him. I remember our first conversation and me being nervous. I was inwardly telling myself “Don’t stutter” or “don’t mess this up,” and the more I got to know this guy, the more attracted I became.
Whenever this guy flew into town, my heart would skip a beat. This guy had mutual friends of mine, so our friends were best buds, which meant he visited a lot, and if you can only image how happy I was to hear that he was back in this small town, I was quite thrilled.
I got to really know this guy for a good amount of time, and then after awhile, I knew that I was falling “head over heels.” I was deeply intrigued with his love for God, his patience, and I was thinking “This guy is one heck of a godly man.” His love for Christ was what attracted me to start with, and I was thinking that God was sending me this godly guy.
Sadly, things didn’t go the way I wanted them too, and that is okay. There was nothing wrong with this guy. He was godly, he was sweet, caring, and loved children, which was a plus, but God told me “He’s not the one.”
I remember feeing somewhat frazzled. One day, God told me “Christina, I have someone else for you,” I then wondered “But God this guy is godly and humble,” but now that I am looking back, God does have someone better for me; a man who is meant to be with me. Sure, that guy was godly, but just because he was a godly man did not make him “the one” by default.
The reason God told me “No,” was because God didn’t have me written in that guy’s love story nor was he in mine, and sometimes, that’s how things are. A lot of people talk about people not working out due to things going wrong, but sometimes, relationships don’t happen just due to the fact that they were never meant to be.
Sometimes, God says “No” when things seem right, because God has something even better in store for you. When I was 18 and I first met that guy, I thought he was the right guy, a guy that God would approve of, and though he might have been a wonderful guy, he wasn’t God’s match for me.
I wasn’t heartbroken at all, but this time, I let God take over and He did. He told me “Christina, no” before I ever drove myself into the rocks of heartache. Godly people aren’t immune to heartbreaks, and God not only saved me from a broken heart, but he also saved that guy from one too.
The worst thing to ever happen, is for two godly people to get heartbroken unintentionally. It’s one thing to get your heart broken by a person who was horrible from the start, but when the person your heart is broken by is a godly person who you thought could be “the one,” then it is double the pain, and I thank God for saving me from that pain.
There is a way that seems right to a man,
But its end is the way of death.” Proverbs 14:12
Just because someone looks “right” or something seems right, it doesn’t mean it’s right for you. Though a way might be right to a man, it could lead to ultimate destruction. Our hearts aren’t prefect, and we fail daily, and that is why we must depend on God, for He is perfect and just in all of His ways.
Just because a guy might meet each of my standards, does not mean that guy meets God’s standards for me. God has one man for me; therefore, out of 8 billion people, only one will be my husband. =
When I first started reading Christian dating books in high school, I read one book that explained how you should ask God for clarity before ever envisioning a future with someone, for God is very responsive to those who seek Him and trust HIm. With you show God that you are giving Him control in all aspects of your life, He will direct your paths. God has a plan of hope for you, so don’t be afraid to ask God anything, for God has no limits in His abilities.
Ever since that guy was a “no go,” I have now instilled this internal questionnaire on guys that I find myself gravitating towards. I inwardly ask “Have I asked God about him” and “Though he is godly, do I honestly see him as being a person who I could be married too?” It’s one thing for a man to be godly, but it is another thing to be married to him, so you must always ask yourself “Do I see myself married to this person in the long run?”
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11
There will be times when God closes a door that you wanted to open, but He closes doors that lead to your demise. What you think is best might not be the best for you. God doesn’t just want to settle for “good” in your life, but He wants to give you the best in life. Trusting God might come with days where you wonder why God is declining certain things, but God promises you a future of hope, so why doubt God when He thinks of hope for you?
“Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”” 1 Corinthians 15:33
God has a plan for each of us, and that also includes the people in our lives. The people you are around have the power to corrupt you if you aren’t careful, and that might be why God says “no” to certain people you really want to date. The Lord sees a person’s heart, and there might be something in their heart that you might not see, but God is wanting to protect you from, so never question God’s response, for He’s watching out for you at all times.
Though things seem right, God sees the bigger picture and knows the future. When I was 18, I liked this guy that my friends were always hanging out with, but though he appeared to be godly, God didn’t want my heart being invaded by heartache, so He guarded my heart. One day, the right man will be made known to me, and that man is worth waiting for.
I don’t just want a “good man,” but I want God’s best for me, and if it means 10 doors closing and only one door opening, then so be it, because my future husband is worth the wait, and I don’t want to put myself on a path that isn’t leading to him, so trust God to close doors even if they seem like the right answer, for though it “seems right,” it may turn out to be your worst nightmare, so always consult with God before making decisions on your own.