You know how you listen to a song that you’ve heard a million times, but then the meaning hits you like a brick wall? That might have happened to me just a few moments ago. Might I just say “O Come To The Altar” is one moving song.
I’ve heard that songs millions of times and it has brought me to tears many times, but today, it was exactly what I needed for I’ve been under so much stress these past few weeks, and the message is moving, so if you’ve been stressed or broken, then give the song a listen, and you instantly feel God’s love!
Anyways, Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, and as I sit here trying to think of a post to write in honor of the day where red roses and chocolates are going to be high in supply and demand, I thought I’d go a different route.
Let’s put the focus on ourselves and on our hearts.
Do you think that you would be able to attract a spouse in the current state your heart is in?
Are you living to glorify God, because if you aren’t, then how can you glorify God in a marriage?
Do you put Christ first always, because if you do not, then how can you put your spouse first in the marriage?
It’s very easy to say what we want in the person we want to marry, but putting the spotlight on ourselves is another story. Having to examine our hearts and ask for conviction of the things that aren’t attracting godliness takes a desire of wanting to step out of our comfort zones and being placed into the interrogation room.
You cannot attract the person you want to marry if you aren’t striving to be the person you desire to have. Godliness is not attracted to back-row Christianity where you sit in church and then forget Jesus the next day. Godliness is attracted to godliness, and if you aren’t striving to be godly in all things, then how can you expect a godly spouse to fall out of the sky in the middle of nowhere?
“Create in me a clean heart, O God,
And renew a steadfast spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10
For the past few months, I have been putting myself in the hot seat. I have written down things I like about myself and then I wrote down things I did not like about myself. The things that I listed under “Do not like” are the ones I am praying are changed and molded into something good. Along with this, I also examine my heart in detail. I ask myself “Do I have the fruits of the spirit?” “Am I glorifying God?” “Am I loving my neighbor?” and then I ask myself “Am I truly wanting to be the woman God wants me to be?”
Those questions have brought me into conviction many times, I have dug deeper into the Word, and God has been edifying my heart, soul, mind, and strength. I am not going to write abut how to find love or what you should look for in a spouse, because I have many posts on that subject, but this time, it’s time to focus on the person in the mirror.
You cannot find love when your heart is a garbage dump.
You cannot expect a godly spouse when your heart isn’t godly.
You must make sure that you live what you preach, and if you want a godly man to sweep you off your feet, then you better be a godly woman who’s love for Christ is so radiant that you capture a man’s heart the moment you step foot in the same room as him.
I don’t just say that I want to be a woman of integrity, modesty, patience, selflessness, wisdom, joy, happiness, lovingkindness, and all of these other things, but I ask for the conviction to be those things, to live those things, and to be an example of those things.
I have been through a lot of change this past few months from who I am as a person to who I want to be. I am more godly than what I was ever before, but I also know that I still have more to learn and more growing to do.
I am a future wife in training, and I am going to admit that the process of becoming a godly young woman who is praying for a godly man isn’t for the faint of heart, for you have to get out of your comfortable area and you must have the desire to change and clean the things in your heart.
I am not a perfect girl, and I refuse to present myself as a “Perfect Christian girl who has it all together,” because trust me, there are days where I am a mess, and I am far from perfection.
“Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ.” 1 Corinthians 11:1
I am just a girl traveling a narrow path, seeking Christ, and though I stumble at times, He is there to pick me up and to encourage me to continue to see His presence and glory, and my marriage with my future husband is going to be a representation of Christ. Christ is selfless, loving, slow to anger, and if I want to marry a man who is Christ-like, then I must be able to bring the same thing to the altar.
So this Valentine’s Day, put yourself in the hot seat and make yourself uncomfortable. Ask for conviction, ask God to change you, and ask Him to shape you not only into the person He wants you to be, but into the person your future spouse is praying for.
I believe and know that my future husband is a godly man, and he’s probably expecting me to be godly, to be patient, to be joyful, to be modest, to be sweet, and to be an encouragement, so I strive to be those things. Marriage is about selflessness, it’s about wanting to help each other to grow closer to Christ, and how can you grow closer to Christ is only one person in the relationship is pulling their weight?
A godly marriage requires two godly people set on being Christ-like, and that is what singles should be focusing on. Instead of watching romance movies tomorrow, focus on being a spouse in training, and change the things that you know are not going to attract godliness.
When you take an effort to strive to be more godly, then you will see results. Don’t do this just for a spouse, but do this so you can grow closer to Christ, for I have grown so much closer to Him this past month alone. As He has been changing me for the better, I can truly say that the process of putting yourself into a state of being uncomfortable is worth it, because I am now so much stronger in Christ and my heart is even more Christ-like!
If you want a godly spouse, then you must be godly, so remember that when you’re dreaming about wedding bells, and challenge yourself like I did and see what needs to be changed, because when you do, not only do you become more like Him, but you grow closer to Him, and being close to the Savior is the best relationship you could have.