Here I am scurrying to write this post, and I am looking for words to say, but I know exactly what to write about, but my fingers cannot keep up with my mind when typing, for this conversation was brought up in a group discussion, and it inspired this post, which is why we are here.
Where did godly standards go?
In our society, dating is viewed as “nonchalant,” but I disagree. If you are going to date, date with the future purpose of it leading to marriage or don’t date at all. When you view each person you are interested in as a potential spouse, then it will make you become selective and have high standards.
However, many people do not do that, and it isn’t just men, but it is ladies too, for both genders are equally as guilty of this.
A lot of people might ask me why I am so carried away with this, but there are so many lessons that people are not learning. If the person you are dating does not reflect Christ, then were you really searching for godliness? Were you really after Christ if you are willing to settle for someone who does not view Him as important as you do?
“Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”” 1 Corinthians 15:33
Those question are not easy “surface” level questions, and whoever you date reflects who you are as a person. God was a clear when He said “Do not be unequally yolked.” As godly singles, we should seek a significant other who loves Christ, who is dedicated to Christ, and who we are okay with bringing home to our parents.
If you cannot see yourself bringing home that person to your parents, then that is a good indication that something is wrong. I am a very old-fashioned young woman, and I believe that the father’s blessing is important. Sadly, My father passed away, so he will not be able to meet the man I bring home nor will he be able to give his blessing to a man, but my mom will; therefore, my mother’s opinion is important to me.
If you wouldn’t want your parents meeting that person, then why are you dating them? Since when did standards only relate to certain aspects of life? Standards should be high in every single relationship you have; friends, acquaintances, and even with people you go on first dates with.
“Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14
If a man is not dedicated to Christ and if he isn’t a strong man of God, then I will not be giving him a first date, and I will not apologize for that, because God says that I am worth more than a mediocre man, and I refuse to date a man who his unequally balanced when it comes to Christ. In fact, I want a man who is more dedicated to Christ than I am, because I want a man who will be able to continuously encourage me and guide me closer to Christ.
I know that may sound forward, but sometimes, you have to get your hands in the mud and lay down the rules, because who you marry should be godly, and I am not settling for an average “post a verse occasionally on Twitter” type man who goes to church “sometimes,” because I want a man who is so much more than that.
Why date an ungodly person if you know it’s going to lead to heartache? Surely, a godly person doesn’t plan on marrying an ungodly person, right? Therefore, why even open the door to hurt and pain by dating a person who isn’t godly? I do not believe in dating every single person who passes me by, so why would I date an ungodly man if I know I will have to one day end the relationship due to him preventing me from finding a godly man?
“Keep your heart with all diligence,
For out of it spring the issues of life.” Proverbs 4:23
God also does not want us to give our hearts to just any person, so we should date with the intention of wanting to see if that person is the one, and if a person isn’t godly, then why would you even entertain the idea of dating them to start with?
I know my future husband is a godly man, so why would I compensate for a temporary “status change?” I want a permanent, long-lasting marriage with a godly man, and if it means saying no to men who do not rise to the standards of godliness, then so be it, but I I refuse to settle for less, and I refuse to date a man who I could not see a potential marriage with.
Sometimes, saying “No,” can hurt, but in the long run, it prevents heartache, and you will be able to focus finding godliness more than you would if you entertained a “half godly” relationship, so why date an ungodly person if it’ll end badly anyways?
Save yourself from heartache, and let God write your love story, for He is the best author known to man.
Again the best way to avoid dating ungodly people, is if you date with marriage in mind. If you do that, then you will not settle for a person who is not Christ-like, so date with marriage in mind, or don’t date at all.
Amen! Great post! Thanks for sharing this!
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Thank you so much, Leigh! God bless! 🙂
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I admire your desire to hold onto godly standards and intentional relationships. That’s encouraging! We need more examples of young people doing this 🙂 Keep following Christ, no matter what you see and no matter what anyone says.
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Just exactly what I wanted to say
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Thank you so much Liz for your sweet words! God bless you! 🙂
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Absolutely! God bless you, dear! 🙂
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Sadly, this idea is considered “ancient” to many. People do so many things recreationally now, often clouding their ability to discern the will of God. Thank you for encouraging Christian young women to be women of virtue! This is also a good word for Christian men.
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Dating has been considered a recreational activity in today’s day, and I pray that people begin to see that relationships are very important. Thank you so much for your words, and God bless you! 🙂
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For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 1 Corinthians 7:14
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Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity. 1 Timothy 4:12
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Great post Christina, and spot on.
It would be very interesting to have a chat with the dude she is “dating” that’s for sure, in the mean time could be an awesome opportunity for you and your network to be praying for both of them. How awesome it would be to see both their eyes opened.
I feel for the Christians who pursue non believers to date or marry who don’t really understand what t hey are doing (they really need to hear truth) and to the Christians who intentionally go out of the body to get a partner all I can think of is Proverbs 1:22-29
Thanks for posting
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I feel for those who date ungodly people as well. It makes no sense to me, and it really breaks my heart for them! I pray that they seek Christ and realize the importance of a godly marriage!
God bless you! 🙂
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Yes, yes, and yes!
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God bless you! 🙂
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yup! setting standards was the best thing I ever did . I thank God for opening up my eyes. We are worthy of God’s best !
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We are most definitely worth God’s best, and we should never settle for less! God bless you! 🙂
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Wow! You go girl! That from a 40 something man, lol. My fiance will love this – we just talked about it a week ago. Following for sure. Thanks.
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Thank you so much for your words! God bless you! 🙂
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Yes mam.
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Keep being consistent with your standards dear
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Thank you so much for the encouragement! Have a blessed day! 🙂
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